Lately I've felt more often than not that I'm drowning, slowly. It's happening so slowly in fact, that no one really notices I'm even underwater.
I'm too proud to call for help, and too unwilling to burden others to blindly grab out to pull myself up by whoever is closest.

Drowning is the most terrifying death I can imagine.

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Broke up with a boy Friday.
Still sad about it.

We only dates for a little over a month so it shouldn't hurt so much.... But to be honest I hadn't felt the way I did the first couple of weeks when it was going so well for... Well for around 5 years or so.

Was nice to have butterflies. And look forward to seeing him.

Oh well.

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Today I realized I'm a crazy dog person. Like a crazy cat lady, but much more socially acceptable, and I only need one dog.

The moment of realization?

I was absent-mindedly petting Caillou while watching X-Files (integral to the story that I mention that detail, of course) - when he turns his head and looks at me. I look into his heart breaking soft ( Read more... )

Woke up this morning feeling pretty much as I did before I fell asleep - headache, heartache and full of melancholic blahs.
(read - emo).
Got myself and the dog dressed to grab a coffee and on our way out I noticed an old, beat up cabinet in the hallway, made of old barnyard wood painted maroon.
Someone recently moved out of another unit on my ( Read more... )

Dear Journal-

Hey stranger, remember me? Oh, you don't?
Oh... No I get it, it really has been awhile. I wasn't trying to push you out of my life, I swear it... I guess we just drifted apart?

But, well Journal, this is a bit hard for me, regardless here it goes:
Life has changed, a lot in the past few years. I took you for granted, I really did, and I ( Read more... )